


No Hetero Tho

by v_larr



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Bisexual, Coming Out, Confessions, Everyone Is Gay, Everyone's oblivious how about that, Gay, Gen, LGBTQ Themes, Lesbian, Multi, Nonbinary, Oblivious Noya, Oblivious Tanaka, Pansexual, Polyamory, Research, demisexual, fight me, hinata somehow knows everything, iwaizumi was kageyama's sexual awakening, oblivious daichi, queer, rated teen cause of like three swear words, sexual awakenings, tanaka and noya really care, tsukki couldnt care less
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-07
Updated: 2018-05-07
Packaged: 2019-04-28 15:36:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14452326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/v_larr/pseuds/v_larr
Summary: The story of how no one in the Karasuno Volleyball Club turns out to be straight.





	No Hetero Tho

**Author's Note:**

> Shoutout to the Stream Team for cheering me on and helping me write this! Love you gaysssss
> 
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> I mean guys

It starts when Kiyoko supposedly arranges a team meeting.

No one seems to know what’s going on except for Yachi, who’s red in the face and even more jumpy than usual. Kiyoko, strangely enough, looks nervous as well, which immediately has everyone on edge. Practice runs oddly because of this; everyone is tense and technique is off. 

Once practice ends and everyone cleans up, Kiyoko clears her throat. “Um, everyone?” she almost whispers, voice shaky. It seems the only people who hear her are Tanaka and Nishinoya, who are not only nearby, but have been paying attention to her every move.

“Hey everyone!” Tanaka yells, bringing the others’ attention. “Kiyoko-san wants to say something.” 

Kiyoko stands right outside the gym doors, left hand on her bag strap, right hand fidgeting on the sleeve of her jacket. Even the first years know how unlike her this is. Everyone stands around her awkwardly, unsure of what to do.

“So, um, there’s something I have to tell you.” She looks anxious, much different from her usual demeanor. She won’t look anyone in the eye, and she won’t stop clearing her throat. 

“Is something wrong?” Sugawara asks, ending the silence. 

“No, not at all, it’s just…” Kiyoko sighs. “I’m a lesbian. I like girls.”

Everyone is quiet. Yachi, who stands next to Kiyoko, squeaks so high it’s almost inaudible. 

“...I’ve been wanting to tell you all for a while now because,” she smiles, “Hitoka-chan and I have started dating.”

Yachi squeals, face reddening at the same rate her smile grows. 

“So, um, yeah.” Kiyoko holds Yachi by the hand and takes one last look at the boys, who are still huddled awkwardly in front of the pair. “I’m really sorry for worrying you all,” she says, “I just needed to get it off my chest.” The two girls walk off into the sunset, hand in hand. 

And for a moment, everyone is silent. At least until the two loudest second years burst into sobs. 

“KIYOKO-SAAAAAANNNN!!” Nishinoya and Tanaka yell simultaneously, tears running down their faces. They’re not the only emotional ones; Asahi’s silently wiping away his tears and Hinata blushes in surprise, eyebrows raised and mouth in a large O. Sugawara, on the other hand, pouts in confusion, not taking his eyes off the floor. 

“Okay, I think you guys are overreacting,” sighs Daichi. “We shouldn’t make this awkward by making a big deal out of it. Clearly, Shimizu-san had a hard time telling us and freaking out like this might just make her feel weird about it.” 

“But…” Tanaka croaks, tears still running down his eyes. “Kiyoko-san...came out to us…”

“...Which means she trusts us,” Nishinoya finishes, rubbing his eyes. “I can’t believe she trusts us so much…”

It’s at this point that Tsukishima, who had been almost unresponsive the whole time, lets out an irritated sigh.

*********************************************** 

“Okay, Noya-san,” says Tanaka, as the two walk through the school halls in search of a computer lab, “you know what we need to do.”

Nishinoya nods, closing his eyes for a moment. “Yes, Ryuu, in order to understand more about Kiyoko-san, we must learn more about this community.” 

They finally find what they’re looking for and enter, determined looks on their faces. They look confident in what they’re about to do, at least they do until they bump into Daichi and Sugawara.

“What are you guys doing in the library?” Sugawara asks innocently, rearranging the books in his bag. Daichi looks at them suspiciously.

“Yeah, you guys aren’t exactly the reading and researching type,” he says, brows raised.

Nishinoya simply smiles in response. “We’re just gonna look up some stuff.”

“Well you’re out of luck, the school library’s about to close. If you want you can come with Daichi and I,” Sugawara says.

“Yeah, we’re going to my house to study. Don’t think we’ll be using computers so you can borrow mine.” 

“Thanks, Daichi-san, Suga-san!” the two second years exclaim, bowing. They follow the other two outside, a slight spring in both of theirs steps.

It’s not until they get outside that Daichi begins to question them again.

“So what are you guys looking up? I don’t want to open my computer to find close ups of girls in bikinis again.” The statement makes Sugawara burst out laughing and Tanaka turn red in embarrassment.

“We just want to learn more about the gay community so we can understand Kiyoko-san better,” Nishinoya replies, proud grin on his face.

“How hard is it to understand?” Sugawara asks, the slightest bit of annoyance in his voice. “She likes girls, and she’s dating one. It’s not difficult.”

“That’s the thing though!” Tanaka says. “How does she not like guys? They’re insanely attractive!”

Daichi and Sugawara almost stop in their tracks. 

“What?”

“I mean, I get how she likes girls, I mean, have you SEEN them? But how does she not like guys?”

“Uh…”

“Is that possible?” Nishinoya asks, filled with curiosity. “To like both genders?”

“Actually,” Daichi cuts in, “there’s more than two-”

“That’s so interesting! I’ll have to look that up too!”

“Oh would you look at that,” Sugawara says, “we’re here.”

*****************************  


Daichi and Sugawara bitterly regret inviting Tanaka and Nishinoya. The two won’t shut up about every random fact they find, whether it be proven true or not. The sound makes it incredibly hard for them to concentrate on their notes.

“Apparently there are 72 genders?”

“Yeah and look, it’s called the LGBTQ+ community. That means lesbian and gay, which is obvious, then there’s bisexual which means liking two genders, and there’s transgender, which is identifying with a gender that’s not your birth one, and queer which is pretty much an umbrella term…”

“And there’s a thing called pansexual-”

“Woah haha, does that that mean you’re attracted to pans?”

“Don’t be a dick, Ryuu, it just means-”

“WILL YOU TWO SHUT UP ALREADY?” Daichi yells, bags beginning to form under his eyes. “It’s almost 2am, Suga and I have been trying to study but you guys keep yelling!” Sugawara, who had almost fallen asleep, jolts awake.

“Ahhh, sorry Daichi-san,” Tanaka says, guilty look on his face. “We’ll be quiet from now on.”

“Oof,” Nishinoya whispers, turning to his phone. “Woah, apparently one in four men are gay, and that means there are three in the team...Personally, I hope Asahi-san is one of them, since he’s hot as hell.”

“Alright, time to go home!” Daichi yells, a terrifying smile on his face. “I think you guys could use your phones if you want to do any more research!” He grabs Tanaka and Nishinoya by the collars of their shirts and lifts them out of their chairs, proceeding to push them out through the hallway and out the front door. 

“I guess you’re right, Daichi-san! Thanks for letting us use your computer, though!” Nishinoya exclaims with a thumbs up. Daichi glares at him. 

“Yeah, I think we’ve learned enough and now we can be better straight allies!” Tanaka says with a triumphant smile on his face. Daichi rolls his eyes.

“Yeah, straight,” he comments before slamming the door in their faces. 

**********************************************************************  


“They’re very high spirited aren’t they,” Sugawara questions, a tired smile on his face. Daichi sighs. 

“Yeah, and over something so small. I don’t think Shimizu-san would appreciate them yelling at her about everything they’ve learned. And after it took her so long to tell us too.”

“Honestly, that troubles me a little. Why did it take her so long to tell us?” Sugawara looks tense now, as though it’s been bothering him for a while.

“Who knows? Maybe she felt alone or something.”

“I don’t get why, considering we’ve known her for such a long time, and it’s not like she’s the only one who’s LGBT out of us third years.”

“Wait, what?” Daichi asks, shock in his voice and eyes wide open. 

“D-did you think I was straight?” Sugawara has the same confusion in his voice that Daichi feels.

“I, well, yeah…”

“Oh, I thought I was really obvious...I’m bi.” 

“...Oh,” is all Daichi can bring himself to say. For some reason, his heart’s starting to beat incredibly fast. So, Sugawara likes boys too. “How long have you known?”

The question makes Sugawara blush. “I guess I found out when I realized I had a crush on a boy friend of mine, um, last year? Even though I was still infatuated with Shimizu.” Sugawara chuckles. “Honestly, that crush still hasn’t gone away, even though I’m sure he doesn’t like me back.”

“Oh?” Daichi’s mentally smacking himself now. How could he be so oblivious?

“I had even flirted with him, a lot I think, but he never took me seriously, I guess.” Sugawara won’t look Daichi in the eye now, and his face is red as a tomato. Daichi can’t help it, he leans forward and holds Sugawara’s hands.

“I’m sorry that asshole couldn’t take the hint,” he almost whispers, “but I’m positive he likes you too.”

****************************************

“Alright, everyone, I think we need to talk,” Daichi calls, setting his bag down in the club room. Everyone’s already inside, either changing or chatting with each other. The team sits down in a circle right in the middle, almost everyone cross legged. Daichi clears his throat.

“Right, so it seems as though we’ve all blown what Shimizu-san told us out of proportion. So let’s get something straight, okay?”

“I’m not,” Sugawara whispers. Daichi smiles at the comment, but shakes his head and continues.

“So I know we’ve all been curious after what had happened last week, and maybe some have even resorted to research...”

Tanaka and Nishinoya nod triumphantly, unaware of Daichi’s glare.

“...And looks like there’s more to being LGBT than we thought.”

“I kind of regret looking some of it up,” Asahi whimpers, eyes wide. “I accidentally encountered, some, um…”

“MOVING ON,” Daichi interrupts, waving his hands. Hinata, who was quieter than he’d ever been, laughs.

“Oh I already knew a lot about it. Kenma explained it to me a few months ago when he told me he was experimenting with his pronouns,” Hinata explains. “So sometimes he’s a he and other times they’re a they. I found it confusing at first but it’s not really that hard.”

“Well,” Daichi adds, “I don’t want this to be some big Coming Out thing cause I’m pretty sure a lot of us thought we were straight before the events of last week.”

“I’ve known I was gay since my first year of middle school.” 

It takes a few seconds for everyone to realize it was Kageyama that had said that. Before then, it was impossible to notice he was there, since he sat quietly, munching on a banana. 

“Yeah, I remember all the boys would talk about how cute the girls’ team looked in their shorts while I couldn’t stop staring at Iwaizumi-san’s arms.” He says it in a bored voice, like he couldn't care less about things like sexuality. Hinata, on the other hand, is in shock, mouth wide open and face burning. Kageyama simply shrugs. “I never really put much thought to it cause how is being gay related to volleyball?”

“Of course you’d say that,” Hinata grumbles, pout on his face. It quickly disappears as he confesses, “I’ve identified as as pansexual since my third year.”

“Pan...sexual?” Yamaguchi asks, entering the conversation.

“It means I’m attracted to people regardless of their gender. Like if you’re cute you’re cute no matter what,” Hinata explains with a smile. Yamaguchi nods in understanding.

Tsukishima rolls his eyes. “This is bullshit, why are we talking about this?”

“Well, what are you Tsukishima?” Tanaka asks.

“Dead inside,” Tsukishima deadpans.

“No, like, what’s your sexuality,” Nishinoya pushes.

“I’m attracted to the idea of death taking me in its arms any day now.”

“Alright then...How about you, Yamaguchi?” Sugawara asks. Yamaguchi blushes in response.

“I’m not really sure...I mean I like this girl, but there’s also this boy…” Yamaguchi’s face is almost crimson, and he trembles in embarrassment. 

“You don’t have to tell us if you don’t feel comfortable,” Daichi says.

“No, I can tell you all. I guess I’m just not sure what I would label myself.”

“Just remember that you don’t need a label!” Hinata says. “And if you’re not sure you can always identify as queer, it’s an umbrella term for anyone that’s not straight.”

Yamaguchi smiles at Hinata’s statement. “Yeah, I like that.”

“Well, if we’re doing this, I’m demi,” Tsukishima confesses. His words cause everyone, even Tanaka and Nishinoya, to look at him in confusion.

“Demi…” Nishinoya mumbles, trying to remember where he had read it.

“Lovato?” Tanaka guesses.

“No…” Tsukishima sighs, clearly regretting his words. “Demisexual, it’s when you’re only sexually attracted to someone after having an emotional connection with them.”

“Emotional connection? Guess you’ll never be attracted to anyone, Tsukishima!” Hinata snickers. 

“Don’t say that!” Yamaguchi exclaims, frowning.

“Shut up, Yamaguchi,” Tsukishima says, starting to blush.

“Oh, sorry Tsukki!”

“I think I’m asexual,” Asahi states. “I read about it and it means you don’t experience any sexual attraction and I think that applies to me…”’ 

Nishinoya laughs at Asahi’s confession. 

“Wha-what is it, Nishinoya?”

“Well,” he replies, snickering, “I read about it too, and you know what the short form version of asexual is?”

“Oh what is it, Noya-san?” Tanaka asks in curiosity. Nishinoya smirks before replying.

“Ace.”

“WOAAAAAAAHHHHHH NOYA-SAN NICE KILL,” Hinata yells, bursting into laughter right afterwards. Asahi chuckles as well, hand behind his neck.

“Well then, I can’t believe everyone came out,” Daichi says, standing.

“Um,” mumbles a voice.

“What a surprise!”

“What about-” asks another voice. 

“Can’t believe that’s everybody!”

“Ignore him,” says Sugawara, looking at Ennoshita, Kinoshita, and Narita. “How about you three? Is there anything queer about you guys?”

“We’ve been in a relationship for a while now, actually,” replies Ennoshita, smiling.

“Wait, like the three of you together?” Hinata asks.

“Yeah, it’s called a polyamorous relationship,” Narita adds.

“Now you know why I always look tired,” Ennoshita comments, smirking. Kinoshita gasps.

“Rude!”

Daichi laughs. “Is there anyone here that IS straight?”

No one replies for a minute.

“The question is,” Sugawara finally says, “why would you want anyone to be?”

*********************

It’s dark outside now, and the whole team is outside together. Coach Ukai’s store is closed today, so the third years had to buy pork buns from another store. While they’re not as good as the place the players are used to, they are quite tasty, so everyone munches away at them.

“That sure was a ride, wasn’t it?” Daichi chuckles.

“We better thank Shimizu later for everything,” Sugawara continues, fingers twisting around Daichi’s.

“Oh, I should tell Kenma! They’d be glad their team isn’t the only one that’s insanely gay,” Hinata says as he takes out his phone.

“He-they shouldn’t really worry I mean have you seen Seijoh? I only know some of its members but the ones I do know flirt way too much with each other to be straight,” Kageyama comments.

“I heard way too many jokes from Bokuto-san to assume Fukurodani’s members are straight,” Tsukishima deadpans.

“Wait! There’s still Coach Ukai and Takeda-sensei!” Hinata remembers aloud. The others gasp.

“Oh yeahhh!” Tanaka and Nishinoya say simultaneously.

“Guess we can’t assume everyone here is LGBT in some way,” Sugawara dramatically sighs, then laughs.

As the team discusses this, they happen to walk by an Italian restaurant, one with its curtains drawn and filled with candlelight, and its romantic music can be heard from outside.

And right at the window, they see Ukai and Takeda, not only sharing a large plate of spaghetti, but also staring at each other with soft smiles and quiet chuckles. 

“Well then,” Daichi sighs, “I guess it’s official.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading my attempt at humor! Likes and comments would be appreciated and if you want more insanity, check out my Tumblr @omgrandomwords and check out my friend Sarah's Tumblr @aninsignificantfork (thank you frien for helping me edit!!!!)


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